Jam and Open Mic Etiquette
Don't ever be afraid to go to a jam, but don't go in blind, either!
If You’re Nervous About Going To Your First Jam
The first jam I ever played at was run by a local music store owner & guitar teacher. He was also a great guy. I was not a student, but I frequented his shop. The jam was held at a burger joint & bar, and it was open to all ages and skill levels.
The first time I went, I was really nervous. But when I came off the stage that first time, I got lots of applause, pats on the back, and compliments. I’m sure some folks were not entertained by my playing, but I honestly couldn’t see them. They were drowned out by the positive vibes.
I was an “ok” player and a “not great” singer. I knew that at the time. These people were not all being appreciative of my ability. They were being encouraging and supportive, and admiring the guts it takes to get up and put myself out there.
Since then, I’ve played in countless jams, in dozens of venues, across at least a half dozen states, in the northeast, southwest, deep south, and midwest United States. I’m a regular at several jams in my local area today. One thing I’ve noticed over the years is that just about every single jam is made up of regular players, other new players, and a community of spectators that is very welcoming and supportive.
Do Your Part To Help It Go Well
The most important thing to remember is what I wrote above: almost all jams are a safe place to be a beginner. If you feel unwelcome, go to another jam. If you go to two different jams in the same city that are both awful experiences, please write to me and let me know! I don’t know what I’d be able to do about it, but who knows - maybe I can be of some help, and if I can, I definitely will!
Let’s talk about some stuff you can do to help things go smoothly at the jam.
1. Get There Early The First Time
For your first jam, it’ll be easier if you get there before it starts and ask the organizer or band leader if there’s a signup. Most jams use a signup sheet so they can get an idea of how many musicians they need to fit in, and make sure they don’t miss anyone. They might also let you know if there are any rules or norms. For example, some jams are a strict “3 songs and out” format, meaning you go up, plug in, play three songs, and unplug & get off stage. Having that expectation set up front keeps things moving smoothly.
2. Be In Tune
If you’re able to get your guitar out at some point after you get to the jam, tune up. Even if you tuned up before you left the house, I frequently find that a tuning key has turned in the soft gig bag I use to transport my guitar. If you have to, tune as soon as you get on stage. It can be quite distracting and confusing if someone is badly out of tune, because it can sometimes be hard to tell where the problem is. The distraction is enough to throw newer players off and possibly make things kinda fall apart.
3. Know What a Key Is
It’s a big help if, when someone says a song is “In G”, you know what that means.
Now, understanding the ramifications of a song being in a specific key is actually a little more complicated than I have space for here, but in about 99 songs out of 100, if the song is “In G”, your first chord is going to be a G chord. If you’re playing at a blues jam, this is true 9999 times out of 10,000.
4. Use Standard Tuning
I have been to jams where a first-timer takes the stage to do a Jimi Hendrix song, and they’re tuned to Eb, because Hendrix tuned to Eb. As much as I am a Hendrix fan, and I tuned to Eb when I was learning his stuff, don’t ever go to a jam tuned to anything but standard E tuning, because that’s what everyone else is going to be tuned to. More experienced guitarists & bass players will adjust on the fly in most cases, in an attempt to be as supportive as possible. But it’ll be uncomfortable for all involved, and it won’t sound the way you want (because the Eb can’t be played open). At the very least, if you absolutely must use a non-standard tuning, clear it with the jam organizer when you walk in the door, not when you get on the stage. They’ll either ask you to tune to E standard, or they’ll make sure the backing musicians are prepared.
5. Watch The Band Leader
At a jam, the band leader is whoever calls the song, and it can change from song to song. The band leader is almost always the singer. You have to watch them because they’re going to use hand gestures, nods, and other body language to communicate a bunch of potential things to the rest of the band (like mid-song stops, the song ending, when it’s your turn to solo, or even what chord to play). If you’re staring at your fretboard, be prepared to feel suddenly off-track every now and then as you’ll miss these cues.
By the way, the band leader is usually the singer, but it doesn’t have to be! If you’re a singer but have never sung at a jam or with a whole band, you can ask the organizer of the jam, or someone who is obviously an experienced player, if they can cue the solos & ending for the other folks on stage. If they know the song you’re playing, they’ll typically be happy to help! At that point, you’re just a singer, not the band leader, so don’t forget to watch the band leader!
6. You’re Allowed To Stop Playing
If you get lost, or you think you’re out of tune, or you played the wrong chord by accident, or whatever, you can stop playing to get your bearings. Nobody cares. It’s a jam, and everyone on stage and in the audience knows that. Nobody expects anyone to be a professional at a jam, even if other folks there are professionals.
That said, know that, when you stop playing, nobody else on stage will stop playing. It is exceedingly rare that a song will completely stop, even at a jam. Instead, if half the band stops playing, the more experienced folks are going to bend over backwards to try to salvage a song for the benefit of the audience, and also to give those who stopped the opportunity to jump back into the groove.
7. If Someone Says To Turn Your Volume Up Or Down - Do It
It is not at all uncommon that a newer player or someone who hasn’t played out in clubs much, or maybe just hasn’t played in that room before, is told to turn up or down (usually down, to be honest). How you respond is going to speak volumes about you to every person in the place.
The only really acceptable response is to try to maintain eye contact with who told you that while you turn down a bit and then keep playing so they can hear the adjustment. They’ll either give you a nod of approval, or give you a ‘down’ wave to request you turn down more. That’s it. No faces, no backtalk, no eye rolls, just do it. Ask questions later.
8. Be Respectful
Don’t show up at a bluegrass jam and ask if you can play a Bob Dylan tune. Don’t show up at a blues jam and ask to play “Play That Funky Music”. Don’t go to a jam that does a lot of folk standards and ask everyone to join you in the most obscure and complicated folk song you can think of. Everyone wants everyone else at a jam to come off happy with what just happened. You need to have that as a goal as well. If you’re too busy showboating to notice that everyone else is thoroughly annoyed, struggling to keep up, etc., it is likely the case that you are the problem.
Respect the format, cadence, genre, and the other general themes and “shape” of the jam. Most importantly, if you fall down in some aspect of this, acknowledge it and apologize, and make sure it doesn’t happen again! Everyone will be patient with mistakes, but repeated mistakes are seen as disrespecting the event and other musicians after a while.
9. Stick Around
If it’s at all possible, don’t leave after you play. Stay until the jam ends if you can. When I was really young, I went to a jam that lasted until 11PM, and I had to be home by 10. It is what it is. But as soon as I was not under a curfew, I have always stayed for the duration. This is not so much an etiquette thing, it’s just a good way to meet other musicians, get more feedback on your playing, figure out how the jam works, watch other more experienced players navigate the same jam, etc. It’s a good way to get a lot of learning by osmosis. Also, at some jams, a lot of great conversations break out while the house band breaks down, waits to get paid, or just hangs around at the bar afterward. It’s kind of a special time. For some reason I can’t explain, bonds are formed here. If nothing else, you’re more likely to be recognized when you show up at the next jam.